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Friday, March 21, 2014

Man Volume

I was in a friends basement the other day when his wife said for him to turn down the music.  "I really cant stand Man Volume." That was the phrase she used. And it really got me to thinking how men are beat from the start. The hunters who are now the providers who become the domestic engineers. And the warrior  shall be restricted to mancaves or bars. There shall be no Man Volume in the house.

And when you have children and move to the suburbs Man Volume is further submerged under making a buck and being a role model. Daddy can not be cranking Black Sabbath while telling his kid to not smoke pot. And so the stereo becomes the last crackling fire on the plains of the War Party. Lest the warrior get too smoky his squaw will come over and douse the flames. "I really hate Man Fires!" And so the warrior grudgingly snuffs his fire.

And this is nothing new. Men become steadily domesticated much like dogs as they get older. They start out frisky and wild and by the end docility moves in and they are left with the Volume  Control as their only totem to their own unbridled youth and to who they were. And even then as U2 or Coldplay or some Zep starts to creep to the halfway mark this too is extinguished with the ruling hand of home and hearth(Turn that Man Volume Down!) ...lest that atavistic  warrior rears his head again.

But when the wife is out of the house and the kids are at school....
 MAN VOLUME BABY!

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Books by William Hazelgrove