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Friday, August 31, 2012

Dirty Harry Crashes and Burns

Well do you feel lucky? Do you punk? Go ahead...MAKE MY DAY. Dirty Harry fired off more than a few rounds at the RNC last night...most of them going into his foot as he inserted it into his mouth. Poor Clint. What happens when your whole life people tell you what you want to hear? You go on a stage with an empty chair and call it the President of the United States. Then you tell the chair and by proxy the President to go fuck himself. A couple of times. And then it gets worse from there as boomers all over America were confronted with a really ugly truth: even Clint Eastwood gets old and stupid. If not downright doddy.

And you felt for Dirty Harry as he  mumbled and bumbled with his chair and tried to come up with shots at the President and going back to his GFY line not a few times. And of course no one had any idea what he was talking about and of course this was right in line with a convention that had been talking to itself for three days and drinking their own kool Aide by the gallon. Who would have thought Mitt and Ryan the Vouchinator were now the protectors of Medicaid? Everyone in the RNC that's who.

But Clint was brought along for that extra sparkle of Hollywood and who would have though that Mr. Macho would have been daft enough to cuss at an empty chair. Mitt and the boys just saw Mr. Red Meat Base Builder Clint who could  bring along every American male who ever watched Dirty Harry or The Outlaw Josey Wales. And against that man the old man was indeed pathetic if not embarrassing. You wanted Clint to at least get rid of the chair but it was apparent he had no intention.

So he finished up where he began. Mumbling. Bumbling, Ranting. Cussing. The chair by contrast was a much better speaker. Clint ran over his allotted time. The chair had time left over and sounded a lot more intelligent than Dirty Harry. Oh, that's right, I mean the President.

Books by William Hazelgrove