Book Trailer For Madam President

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

The Fake Landing on the Moon


There was a show on about how the moon landing never occurred. According to this show the astronauts merely orbited in their can of spam and then after eight days came back down with beards and waved to everyone from the helicopter picking them up like returning crusaders. According to the experts on this show NASA staged the whole thing from Area 51 in locked down studios where the moonscape was recreated. We were all then treated to the elaborate hoax of Americans landing on the moon.

The fascination with conspiracy has certainly produced many strange hypothesis. We just can't believe things as they are. The experts on this show said there was simply no way we could have gone to the moon because we just didn't have the technology. They played tapes of our rockets blowing up and test models of the Lunar Module spinning out of control and then blasting crater sized holes in the desert. Certainly this helps their case. Also they said no man could survive the radiation of deep space. The astronauts would have been microwaved by the sun and that would have been it.
Then there the photos. The experts point out to strange anomalies in the lunar photos pointing out glaring incongruities. Why are there no stars in the photos for instance? Why do the cross hairs on the cameras disappear suddenly? Why are the television pictures so grainy? Why are the shadows from the sun inconsistent? Why do the astronauts take pictures of areas that all look the same? Could it be they are on the same set no matter where they are on the moon? Why is there no dust flying out when the lunar module blasts off? Why is the American flag waving when there is no wind on the moon?
By the end of the show one does begin to wonder. Maybe it was a hoax. Maybe we really didn't go to the moon. But then if we really did stage it all...why stop at the moon? Why not just crank up Star Trek with Spock and the boys and tell everyone look, this is really where we went. See the Clingons and Captain Kirk and Bones and Scotty and Spock--these guys really did boldly go to other planets and Captain Kirk really did have affairs all over the universe and Spock really does have Vulcan ears and a Vulcan Grip and Bones really is an irascible doctor who is really hacked off at Spock for habitually stealing his thunder.
I mean we have Tang and freeze dried ice cream and Star Trek reruns. And if people don't' believe us, then we can just say, Beam Me Up Scotty, and turn out the lights and run out the back door. That'll get em.


Books by William Hazelgrove